Jen

Earth

When I look at this picture of Earth, I am only reminded of how smallĀ I am. Every single hour of my life was spent on that pale blue dot. Every single task I’ve completed was limited to the dot. Every emotion I’ve felt was contained within the blue dot.

The picture truly captures the folly of my own conceit. Often times, I act as if I am so large, when I am actually so small.

I am humbled when I think of just how little of an impact I have had. Every action I’ve taken; every thought I’ve had; and every word I’ve written is forgotten when this light blue speck is covered. Whether it be covered with the tip of a pen only temporarily or with a solar flare permanently, everything about me will be lost forever.

It is only recently that I’ve come across this feeling. Because of it, I now try to worry about myself less and worry about other things more. If this pale blue dot was suddenly wiped out of existence, the only things that would remain would be the untold stories of how successful humanity was.

But on Earth there is so much beauty that is not encapsulated within the pale blue dot. The Christmas Eve Earthrise of 1968 (Photographed by Apollo 8) shows the beauty of our home. However, even from far away, the complexity of human life is not even slightly expressed. The onlooker is not presented with our hideous amounts of racism, our keenness to hurt one another, or the millions of social disputes that happen every day. Instead, they see a world of beauty unlike any other in our Solar System. They see a world of wondrous and spectacular pulchritude.

For at least a moment each day, my heart beats with expedited speed; my pupils dilate; my hair stands on end. This isn’t because I am being attacked or am preying, but simply because I am fighting a battle with myself. The stresses of every day life consume me, and needless to say, you are a cause of many of these moments.

During these moments, sometimes I take a step back. I tune into my favorite Mozart pieces, I drink a warm cup of coffee, and I think about the beauty of the planet I am living on and the magnificence of my existence. I am the result of billions of years of trial and error. Yet, I sit and worry about something so trivial.

It is only human nature to become excited about things that are irrelevant to our planet, the pale blue dot, as a whole. However, what if instead of thinking about the far-and-few negative things, I instead took a step back and observed my life as someone so far away would see it? It is a beautiful coordination between physics, chemistry, biology, and chance. Every moment I live is carefully held in balance by the “laws of nature”, and every thought or action I partake in is simply the result of a magnificent chemical reaction inside of my head. Why do I mull on the small negative things when there are so many beautiful things in life to consider?

When considering the beauty of things in my life, it is hard not to consider the most beautiful thing that my life has ever encountered: you. By chance, we met, and by chance, we got along quite well. Every single word you speak is beautiful to me. You say things in ways that I could never concede to thinking of. You act in ways that I could never elect to act. You think in ways that I would never entertain. I find you so fascinating. You expose me to the beauty of life.

You, alone, remind me of the Earth and its beauty. You remind me that in my actions, I should not only consider myself, but the results of them on those around me, whether it be plants, animals, or humans, all of whom share the earth for as long as we plan on maintaining it.

You remind me that I can enjoy the world without focusing on my own personal image, but rather, focusing on admiring, experiencing, and being involved in the beauty of “nature” as a whole. You remind me of the beauty of life, especially the small things that I look over during every moment of every day.

When you give me those moments that I appreciate so much, I want to give you my world. I want to give you my thoughts, my actions, and my words. I want you to know that you are making my world so much better, and I want you to see it in every thing I do or say.

You make the Earth beautiful for me. You make life beautiful. You make my world beautiful.

There are moments when I know that I fail to express this, however. During these moments, just know that you have single-handedly made my world a much better place. You have become part of my world, and part of me.

I love you, Jeni.

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